Certain people are off limits, You know who they are.

Suppose youre naturally tidy, i mean really neurotically tidy, cant stand to leave the washing for later and always put away everything away after use. And imagine you ended up with a partner who like to spread their possession about and do things at their own will and timing. would you become a messy person to keep them happy, then why would you expect them to become tidy.

The fact is that you cant ask people to change, and even if they wanted to, they couldnt do it. sure they can modify their behavior but they cant change their personality. you might persuade your messy partner to hangup the bathroom towel instead of leaving it on the floor, but i bet they will hang it up all crooked and it would drive you mad because you cant turn them into a tidy person.

Meantime the kitchen would always be messy but clean in their own eyes, the floor of the car would be disgusting in your view but not theirs.

And its not just a question of being messy or tidy, you cant stop someone from being irresponsible, or football obsessed or workaholic or shy or easily stressed.

so if you cant live with this characters dont get involved, whatever you do dont embark on a relationship with someone thinking i can cope with this bit of their personality, you cant change them, you will just make the both of you miserable.

i know no one is exactly perfect, everyone can be irritating from time to time in a relationship (including you) - but youre looking for someone whose irritating habit are worth putting up with, not for someone who you can mold to your personal requirement.